She was not ready for marriage. She did not want any man to touch her. The first counselor she went to thought she must have had a history of sexual abuse, may be in childhood which she doesn’t remember. Many sessions, and she could not come to any conclusion. Later she changed the therapist. This new therapist could get to the cause of her avoiding marriage, which was in fact not about a man touching her, but about anyone touching her and her things. She would make sure she washes her own plate and glass. She would use the same glass for drinking water, milk even soup. She would very rarely eat outside. She was a classic case of OCD- Obsessive Compulsive Disorder. Obsessive-compulsive disorder is characterized by unreasonable thoughts and fears (obsessions) that lead to compulsive behaviors.
After some more sessions, the counselor could find many more things to support this, like she had written on her blanket which side is for feet and which side should come towards her face. She would take too much time for bathing and she would only wear clothes washed by herself.
OCD is an anxiety disorder. So the counselor worked with her on finding the cause of her anxiety. After a few weeks of therapy, she started changing her behavior gradually. Now she started drinking water with any glass at home and using other blankets while sleeping. She still despises people touching her. She doesn’t even like her own mother hugging her. But she is working on it with the support of her therapist. I am not sure if she would still want to get married, because there are many other reasons for which she doesn’t want to marry and most of them are related to society and social situation. But I am sure, one day she will hug her friend or her mother without fear of ‘germs’.
Disclaimer:
1. Prevalence of OCD is More than 1 million cases per year (India)
2. OCD can be treated through CBT and/ or Psychiatric medication.
